Doubts, Laughter, & Faith
As believers, how do we navigate the tension of unfulfilled promises, unanswered prayers, extended waiting, and the realities of living in this world? I’ve been pondering this question for the last few months. At first, I thought it was just me, but then realized a lot of my surrounding community was experiencing the same thing. As this question arose, so did others, as I questioned everything.
In the Old Testament, Sarah laughed at the possibility of her promise coming to pass. I, too, laughed. Would I ever have the joy of seeing my promise fulfilled?
Remember when the three visitors, one of whom was the Lord, showed up at the oaks of Mamre in front of Abraham’s tent?
9 “Where is your wife Sarah?” they asked him. “There, in the tent,” he answered. 10 The Lord said, “I will certainly come back to you in about a year’s time, and your wife Sarah will have a son!” Now Sarah was listening at the entrance of the tent behind him. 11 Abraham and Sarah were old and getting on in years. Sarah had passed the age of childbearing. 12 So she laughed to herself: “After I am worn out and my lord is old, will I have delight?” 13 But the Lord asked Abraham, “Why did Sarah laugh, saying, ‘Can I really have a baby when I’m old?’ 14 Is anything impossible for the Lord? At the appointed time I will come back to you, and in about a year she will have a son.” 15 Sarah denied it. “I did not laugh,” she said, because she was afraid. But he replied, “No, you did laugh.” – Genesis 18: 9-15
Looking at the reality of her situation, her body, her biology, of course, Sarah laughed. After all the years she had likely cried out to God for a child, once she saw she couldn’t give Abraham children, she pulled Hagar into the mix. After waiting so long and not seeing an answer, it is understandable that Sarah laughed. In the past, reading this story, I liked to think I would not have laughed, but living in the reality of waiting so long like Sarah, I laughed at some promises.
Then there came a point where I wasn’t sure I got it right, like John the Baptist. I asked myself and the Lord, “Did I get this wrong? Am I sure I heard from You, Lord?”
1 When Jesus had finished giving instructions to his twelve disciples, he moved on from there to teach and preach in their towns. 2 Now when John heard in prison what the Christ was doing, he sent a message through his disciples 3 and asked him, “Are you the one who is to come, or should we expect someone else?” 4 Jesus replied to them, “Go and report to John what you hear and see: 5 The blind receive their sight, the lame walk, those with leprosy are cleansed, the deaf hear, the dead are raised, and the poor are told the good news, 6 and blessed is the one who isn’t offended by me.” – Matthew 11: 1-6
John was certain Jesus was the Messiah until he wasn’t. This uncertainty happened while he was sitting in prison; a difficult place of waiting. Perhaps he thought the “conquering” Messiah would come and save him, but that is not what happened. His expectation versus the reality of what the Messiah’s presence looked like were two totally different things.
I can relate. There have been prayers God has answered, but they look completely different than I expected them to, and to be honest, I’m a bit salty about that.
Finally, like Doubting Thomas, there are some things I have outright refused to believe until I see them with my own eyes. I have heard what others have said, but refused to believe unless I see with my own eyes. Out of sheer frustration and complete exhaustion, I have thrown my hands in the air, and said, “NOPE!“
24 But Thomas (called “Twin”), one of the Twelve, was not with them when Jesus came. 25 So the other disciples were telling him, “We’ve seen the Lord!” But he said to them, “If I don’t see the mark of the nails in his hands, put my finger into the mark of the nails, and put my hand into his side, I will never believe.” 26 A week later his disciples were indoors again, and Thomas was with them. Even though the doors were locked, Jesus came and stood among them and said, “Peace be with you.” 27 Then he said to Thomas, “Put your finger here and look at my hands. Reach out your hand and put it into my side. Don’t be faithless, but believe.” 28 Thomas responded to him, “My Lord and my God!” 29 Jesus said, “Because you have seen me, you have believed. Blessed are those who have not seen and yet believe.” – John 20:24-29
In the past, I have not readily identified with the above responses. It was more noble to identify with the good, unwavering faith rather than shaky faith. Looking back, that was false humility. But as I sat with this reality, Philippians 2:12-13 came to mind,
12 Therefore, my dear friends, just as you have always obeyed, so now, not only in my presence but even more in my absence, work out your own salvation with fear and trembling. 13 For it is God who is working in you both to will and to work according to his good purpose.
“Is this what it means,” I wondered, “to work out my salvation with fear and trembling?” Wrestling with the reality of my doubts and unbelief. Fighting to stay obedient even when everything is screaming at me not to be.
In this scripture, Paul exhorts the Philippians to “work out their salvation with fear and trembling. Work out was translated from the Greek word Katergazomai, which does not mean to adopt a works-based theology but to see a situation through to the end. Paul was exhorting the Philippians to be obedient as an outworking of their faith in God. The Faith Life Study Bible puts it this way,
“Work out – Emphasizes that obedience is intentional and purposeful. Paul’s point is that salvation, once received, must be put into practice through obedience.”1
So this place of unfulfilled promises, unanswered prayers and navigating the realities of living in this world, is a place of obedience even in its difficulty. Amid trial, obedience might look like tears, anger, doubt, sarcastic laughter, frustration, weariness, being completely emptied out, yet ultimate surrender. It’s the place where we work out our obedience to the very end, so we can live from our true God-given identities.
While it may feel lonely, it’s not a lonely journey:
- Sarah and Abraham waited 25 years to have a son
- Joseph waited about 13 years after being enslaved
- David waited 17 years before being crowned King of Israel
If we dared to look around, we would find that many of us today are waiting for something the Lord has promised. And many of us have been waiting for years.
So, friend, if you’re in the same place of unfulfilled promises, unanswered prayers, and the realities of life, how are you navigating it?
I would love to hear from you. Leave your comments below, or shoot me an email.
Going Deeper
If you would like to go deeper on this subject, I’ve created a reflection journaling guide for you to process where you might be.
Until next week …
Miracles + Blessings!
Brenda
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